kindness

It was quite a few years ago that I first heard the phrase "practice random kindness and senseless acts of beauty." This simple philosophy by author, Anne Herbert, seemed to sweep the world almost overnight, especially once someone of the calibre of Oprah Winfrey picked up the baton and ran with it.

So many people became captivated with the thought of being able to bring some warmth into another person's life by showing kindness in some way. One of the most popular and probably easiest things was to pay the toll for the car behind and for a while there I'm sure the Toll Collectors had a run of people eager to put this philosophy into practice.

There's no question what so ever that kindness has an infective quality about it. One simple kind deed will most definitely make a difference in the life of someone else. The thought of giving a stranger a smile and bit of sunshine is very appealing to most of us. If we were honest, there's also the fact that in the giving we also receive. There's a sense of elation that comes when we do something so unexpectedly beautiful that it catches someone by surprise. So the very act of kindness is as healthy for the one who gives as it is for the one who receives.

I have to admit that the toll booth idea appealed to me enormously. This "hit and run but leave them smiling" type act of kindness had the right combination of fun, generosity and surprise value to make it a winner. But even as much as I enjoyed seeing so many people become excited about doing good, I couldn't help but wonder whether they really believed this was a new concept. How right King Solomon was when he said, "What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun." (Ecclesiastes 1:9 NIV)

One of the many characteristics of our God is that He is loving-kindness, always showing mercy, favor and pity toward us. This quality is part of the very nature and heart beat of God and is the reason why any of us are able to have a relationship with Him. Without His mercy and favor toward us, who could stand?

"The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: "I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness."

As Christians, this quality should be shining from us as well. Kindness (or gentleness as it's translated in the King James Version) is the fifth fruit of the Spirit, and it's a particularly sweet one. It comes from the Greek word chrestotes and can best be described as putting our faith into action by showing benevolence, compassion and affability to everyone we meet, even those who may seem the most prickly.

Even though it was wonderful to see so many people take hold of the concept of living lives of kindness, how much better it would be if we were a little less random. The toll booth idea is marvellous, but who gets the glory? In our "not so random acts of kindness", let's make sure that the One Who is loving-kindness receives the honor. As Jesus said:

"In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven."

As with all the fruit of the Spirit, we don't need to strive and struggle to produce kindness. It should be a natural product of a life that is cultivating Christ-likeness. It isn't just about giving someone a feel good experience, but rather an act of such compassion that it makes a difference in the recipient's life and turns their eyes toward Christ.

Opportunities to show kindness are all around us, if we open our eyes and take time to really look. Some times it's just a case of listening to what someone isn't saying and responding to what the Holy Spirit within us is whispering.

Whenever I think about this particular fruit, one event always comes to mind. Please forgive me if this sounds like boasting because nothing could be further from the truth. It was simply one of those moments when I did actually listen to the Spirit's prompting and acted out of compassion. It saddens me to think how many other times I've missed or ignored His gentle whispers. But this time I heard and lived out my faith.

We have a wonderful shopping center in our suburb. Although not enormous, it has everything we need and an excellent supermarket. There really isn't any need to go anywhere else, which leaves me wondering why this particular day I was buying a small basket of groceries from the rather run down supermarket in a neighboring suburb. Perhaps I'd been to visit a friend and stopped in at this much smaller shopping center on the way home. For whatever reason, there I was in line at the one check out that was open, waiting my turn.

Although I didn't mean to eavesdrop, it was a little hard to do anything else when the conversation was being carried out right next to me. As the lady in front stacked her purchases on the broken conveyor belt, it became obvious that she knew the girl at the cash register. Snippets of the conversation reached me and piecing everything together I worked out that the Check Out girl had just turned 18. Then the teenager said something that broke my heart.

When I heard the tears in her voice I looked up and read the name badge she was wearing. Another Debbie, and a very sad one at that.

The sudden show of emotion was a bit much for the woman who was being served and she was momentarily nonplussed. Eventually she managed to gather up her shopping bags and give a reassuring, "Never mind Deb, he's not worth worrying about. Keep your chin up hey?"

Then she was gone and I was next in line to be served. I wanted so much to say something, but what could possibly comfort this girl, who even then was wiping tears from her eyes as she struggled to pull back some form of composure. But what could anyone say that would ease the pain in this girl's heart? In the end I stayed silent, gave an encouraging smile, paid my money and walked out the door.

Heading straight to the Fruit Shop at the other end of the shopping center I bought a bunch of roses and walked back to the Supermarket. By the time I got there, Debbie was away from the cash register and pushing Shopping Trolleys into line at the store entrance.

With my heart pounding in my chest and feeling just a little embarrassed, I put a hand on her shoulder and gently said her name.

Debbie swung around immediately with an almost defiant look on her face. It was as though she fully expected to be criticised or abused in some way. Before she had time to say a word, I handed her the flowers and said, "Maybe your day will be a little brighter now. God bless!"

With that I gave her another smile and walked away. Strangely enough, I never saw Debbie ever again. I don't know whether it made a difference to her life in any major way, but I do believe it made a difference to her on that particular day. I also believe Debbie will never forget what happened and that she understood that in some way, God had something to do with it.

Random acts of kindness are fun and can change the color of a person's day. But as Christians, let's be very conscious of always living in a way that demonstrates compassion, mercy and kindness to everyone we meet. Let's make it a point to practice Holy Spirit led kindness and heartfelt acts of beauty.

"Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God's kindness: kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile."